Showing posts with label speaking of Casey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label speaking of Casey. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

A Need to Talk About Casey











Reprinted from 2010 (prior version accidentally deleted):

We continue to meet new people who have learned of our loss. We continue to meet parents who have also lost children. It is so clear to me that we need to talk about our children - we need to give their life meaning in whatever ways possible - we do not want our children who lived such very short lives to be forgotten. As I have said before, society does not make it easy sometimes for us to feel comfortable talking about our loss. Some of us have been fortunate to have those surrounding us who try to understand while many of us have not been so fortunate. Talking about our children is another way of keeping them alive. Many of us have also set up scholarships in our childrens' names and have tried to do something positive and lasting in their memory. We do this for them but very much also for us. What do we need to recover? What is recovery from this most awful experience? Someone recently talked to me about the difference between acceptance and peace. I have some measure of acceptance but little if anything in the nature of peace.

Monday, May 3, 2010

My life sentence


Casey will not be creating any new memories-she will not be speaking new words or be having new relationships. I have learned about death and continue to learn about survival and recovery. I need to keep Casey's memory alive. I need to speak of all the things Casey was and did and receive positive affirmation of what a wonderful young woman she had become. I have a hunger to hear how Casey positively influenced other's lives. I well up with emotion when someone who did not know Casey tells me they will change their life in some small way because of Casey.

Casey has been cheated and I have been cheated and I have to get on with life and do the best that I can.What am I doing and who am I doing all this for? It has almost been ten months since Casey died and I can't believe it. Every day I miss her and in some ways it is worse now than several months ago. The nature of my life sentence is growing clearer.